I feel God calling me, and I run the other way. Yes, it's true. For you see, I am neither brave nor courageous. I am timid, shy, lost in the lie from the enemy that I am of no worth to the Kingdom of God. Yes, I know God loves me, and I know Jesus died for my sins, and I certainly am a born again Christian. But if I fail to die daily to myself, and then mentally and physically pick up His cross, then I am weak and unable to be of service to the One I love.
I have bucked up and given in where the writing is concerned. I will write devotionals, some for anyone, but many targeted to the hearts of women. Women who are just like me, trying to make sense of our past mistakes, our heartaches, our successes and our failures alike. We all have them, and we all lament the undone plans and the misunderstood efforts. But we all should celebrate the things we have accomplished, and the joy they have brought to our Heavenly Father.
So, now God is calling me to more. I am to say 'yes' to whatever He brings before me.I have no doubts really, I know He will equip me! But still I have fears and worries, and while some days I am excited and ready to go, other days my heart shivers within itself, anxiety and paralysis one and the same. Yet I still know I have a message for other women. I want to be with them, and share with them my life, my hurts, my victories. I want to share the love of Jesus.
God has shown me how much He loves me. You see,I came to Him in the worst
of times,and He granted me favor. I walked away from Him often, still loving
Him, but also quite stubborn, and full of myself, and with that 'I can do it myself' attitude. Yet He stayed beside me all the time, rescuing me from the drudgery, heartache,and tragedy in my life, whispering to me all the while that He has great plans for my life, and that He loves me completely.
He loves you too. He will take your heart of hearts and heal it, mend it, refine it in the lovely fire of His consuming love. And never again will you hear that little voice that tells you that you are of no consequence, that you are not able, that you have no worth. Instead, you will hear the majestic voice of your Lord telling you over and over again that He loves you, He honors you, that you are the princess of His heart, the apple of His eye, His lovely daughter of whom He is so proud.
Who am I, Lord? I am the one You love. Who are you, my sister? You are the one God loves and cherishes; you are the one for whom He has promised a future, and a hope.
Footnote: I have a heart to serve God, and a great part of that is to serve His daughters, in whatever way He leads. My life is full of stories, some good, some
not so good, but this is what I write about, and how God has changed my circumstances, and my very heart through them. The She Speaks Conference is an amazing place, where women connect to one another, but ultimately to what God has planned for their lives. What an awesome forum this conference is, and how wonderfully are women equipped for the ministry God has called them to. I pray daily that I will become more efficient and annointed to be used by God to touch the hearts of women, my sisters, so that they might have life, and have it more abundantly!
Take a look at Ann Voscamp's blog post regarding this scholarship opportunity. And enjoy her writing, and her heart for God. It's all about women connecting with God, and one another. Find her at http://www.aholyexperience.com/2011/03/how-christians-create-art-she-speaks-scholarship/.
To learn more about the She Speaks Conference visit http://shespeaksconference.com/.